Paint Chart

Sue Burge

Transform your world with this colour, not quite dung, but beyond cud. The sweetness of chewed grass combined with darker undertones makes it ideal for the couple who believe their buried past will never bubble to the surface like the bones of a thought-to-be-extinct behemoth.

Our next colour is always a winner, inspired by the shaggy locks of our beloved mascot. Not quite stain, but beyond smear, it is ideal for couples who find cleaning demeaning but have no wish to exploit those ‘less fortunate’ than themselves. This will give your kitchen a desirable tinge of unwashed conscience.

Our third suggestion is more risqué. Not quite offal, but beyond abattoir, it is ideal for couples who enjoy candlelit home-cooked meals with their closest friends. The deep hues add to the sense of mystery and excitement, the perfect accompaniment to that pivotal whose insinuating foot can that be? moment.

Finally, an intriguing choice. This colour, named after our tragic nine-day Queen, is not quite broken promise, but beyond that dense, slightly flecked texture of smashed plate. For couples prepared to risk everything on a whim or a throwaway comment, this edgy choice speaks volumes.